November 26th, 2008

FOCUS!

Once upon a time there was a chameloen. It’s owner, to keep it warm, placed it on a piece of scotch plaid. It died of exhaustion. – Jean Cocteau, 1919

I was at a traffic safety conference last week and one of the speakers was nineteen year old Darin Wood. Darin had been an outstanding hockey player until a horrific car crash changed that two years ago. He’s in a wheelchair now and will be for life. The vehicle he was a passenger in was going 160km/hr when it went over some train tracks and careened out of control. It rolled over several times and Darin was thrown through the front window, landing dozens of feet away from the car. It was a miracle he survived.

However, what struck me most about Darin’s presentation was his focus. He told us how, weeks after his crash, he was sent to a rehabilitation centre and the first thing he asked his doctor was “Where’s my plan? What are my daily, weekly and monthly goals? We need a strategy to get me out of here . . . because I’m going to grad.”

I turned to the woman sitting next to me in the conference room and whispered, “How the heck can a nineteen year old kid be so focused?”

“Oh,” she says, matter-of-factly, “that’s because of his sports background. He understands the importance of setting goals and working hard to achieve them. Why would it be any different now that he’s in a wheelchair?”

I do know how to set goals and achieve them. It took me eight years to get my first book, A Widow’s Awakening, done – but it did get done. However, the truth of the matter is that since the release of the book in September 2008, I have been running around like a chicken with my head cut off, dashing from book signing to book signing to media interviews to the hospital to visit my mom, to her apartment to feed her cat, to one social engagement or business meeting to another. My phone rings constantly and two days ago there were 275 unopened e-mails in my in-box. Is this how I want to run my business? My life?

No.

So I’ve taken a lesson from Darin and am now getting back to the basics of setting daily, weekly and monthly goals for myself and – what a concept – actually focusing on achieving them. And the next time I catch myself saying yes to yet another demand on my time, or allowing myself to be distracted, or procrastinating on an important task, I will think of Darin struggling to regain the use of his arms or preparing for his next presentation to school kids about the dangers of speeding – and I will remind myself about what’s important. For without focus and follow-through, I’m really just spinning my wheels.

Maryanne